This novel describes
the lives of several women of a Palestinian immigrant family living in
Brooklyn, N.Y.
In 1990, 17-year-old
Isra leaves Palestine after being wed to Adam Ra’ad in an arranged
marriage. She hopes she will find love and
have more freedom and choices: “Surely
she would have more control over her life in the future . . . in America, the
land of the free, . . . perhaps she could have the love she had always dreamed
of, could lead a better life than her mother.”
Unfortunately, her life is one of domestic servitude. Having been taught that “obedience was the
single path to love,” she tries to be the dutiful wife; she does what she thinks
her husband expects and what her domineering mother-in-law Fareeda
demands. She bears only daughters and
that causes tension between Isra and Adam:
“not only had she deprived him of a son, but she had given him . . .
daughters instead. She didn’t deserve
his love. She wasn’t worthy.” Her inability to provide a male heir does not
endear her to her mother-in-law either.
Eighteen years later,
Isra and Adam are dead. Deya, their
eldest daughter, wants to go to college but Fareeda is insisting that she marry. When Deya receives a mysterious message, she
sets out to learn more about her mother whom she barely remembers. She gradually uncovers secrets about her
parents, secrets which help her decide how to shape her future.
The lives of the women
show them to be virtual prisoners in their own homes. Teenaged girls are married off even if they
would prefer a career other than motherhood; women are expected to provide at
least one son and are blamed if they do not do so; women are expected to raise
children without assistance from their husbands; girls must obey their parents
and when married obey husbands and in-laws; if husbands abuse their wives, the
women are blamed and shamed into remaining silent.
Characterization is strong. Isra is developed in depth. She is a quiet young woman; her mother shows
her no affection but she finds comfort in reading and dreams of romance; she is
taken away from everyone she knows to a new world. Her hopes are slowly dashed as she realizes
she will not get the love, freedom or respect she hoped she would find. She starts to believe her mother was correct
when she told her, “’there’s no room for love in a woman’s life. There’s only one thing you’ll need, and that’s
sabr, patience. . . . There is
nothing out there for a woman but her bayt
wa dar, her house and home.
Marriage, motherhood – that is
a woman’s only worth.’”
Isra has no life
outside the home. When Adam first meets her,
he tells her he likes quiet women, but once they’re married he complains that
she is not a conversationalist. She
wonders, “What did Adam expect her to say?
She did nothing besides cook and clean all day, her hand in Fareeda’s
hand, never a moment’s rest. She had
nothing to talk about.” Then when she
asks if Adam could teach her how to navigate the neighbourhood so she could
take Deya for a walk in the stroller, he becomes angry: “’But there’s no reason for you to be out on
Fifth Avenue alone. A young girl like
you on the streets? . . . Besides we have a reputation here. What will Arabs say if they see my young wife
wandering the streets alone? You need
anything, my parents will get if for you.’”
When Isra repeatedly gives birth to girls, her mother-in-law and husband
withdraw from her so she becomes lonely and depressed. Then she becomes guilt-ridden because she
feels she is not being a good mother and fears that her daughters’ lives will
be no better than hers. There are times
I found myself wishing she were less meek but then I would cringe at the
consequences she faced when she did try to speak up for herself and her
daughters.
Fareeda may seem like
the villain of the novel but there are attempts to humanize her. Her past is gradually revealed and it is
clear she has been scarred by life: “shame
could grow and morph and swallow someone until she had no choice but to pass it
along so that she wasn’t forced to bear it alone.” Likewise, the men may seem to be the villains
but they too are shown to be broken and unhappy. Fareeda realizes that “the suffering of women
started in the suffering of men, that the bondages of one became the bondages
of the other. Would the men in her life
have battered her had they not been battered themselves?” Adam wanted to be an imam but because he is
the eldest son he is expected to help support the family; Fareeda constantly
pressures him to do more so that he vents, “’All I do is work day and night
like a donkey! “Do this, Adam! Do that,
Adam! More money! We need a grandson!” I’m doing everything I can to please my
parents, but no matter what I do, I fall short.’” Khaled, Isra’s father-in-law, was the eldest
of ten children growing up in a refugee camp so he too is a damaged
person.
At one point Isra
comments that “the world pressed shame into women like pillows into their
faces.” She continues that shame “had
been passed down to her and cultivated in her since she was in the womb, that
she couldn’t shake it off even if she tried.”
This idea is emphasized through symbolism. While still in Palestine, Isra studies a rug
in her parents’ home: “Spirals and
swirls, each curling up in the exact same way, picking up where the last one
ended.” Isra’s home in Brooklyn has a
similar rug: “There was a pattern
embossed across the edges: gold coils
with no beginnings or ends, all woven together in ceaseless loops.” Sarah, Fareeda’s daughter, notices the
pattern too: “its embroidered lines
spinning in and out of each other, again and again.” This pattern suggests that women, regardless
of the time in which they live, are repeating a pattern that has been laid down
for them. Fareeda, in fact, believes
that “culture could not be escaped. Even
if it meant tragedy. Even if it meant
death.”
All of this suggests a
pessimistic outlook. There is, however,
some hope in the novel. One woman does
escape and make a life for herself. Deya
feels she has no choices but comes to realize that if she chooses to be
courageous, she may be able to avoid repeating the pattern that the lives of
her mother and grandmothers followed.
Though she shares much with her mother (a love of reading, feeling like
an outsider in American culture), she may not have to live as confined a life
as Isra led.
This is an emotional,
thought-provoking read. The author was
courageous to break the code of silence of her traditional Arab culture.
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