4 Stars
Carrie Soto is a legendary tennis star when she retires after setting a record for Grand Slam titles. Six years later, her record is broken so, at the age of 37, with her father Javier as her coach, Carrie comes out of retirement to reclaim her record.
Though there are a lot of tennis matches, this is very much a novel of character. Carrie emerges as a flawed, complex character who is not always likeable. She is described as “self-absorbed and wickedly ambitious” and these traits are in abundant evidence. She is fiercely competitive and goal-oriented, so relentlessly focused on her game that she makes no time to socialize with other players. Aside from her father and her agent, she really has no friends, so she is seen as cold and standoffish. It is not surprising that she earns the nickname The Battle Axe. She is brusque to the point of rudeness; when one player comments that “’The Battle Axe doesn’t talk to us . . . We are beneath her,’” Carrie replies, “’I am ranked number two. And you are ranked- what? Maybe thirty? So in this case, yes, you are beneath me.’” One person tells her, “’every sentence that comes out of your mouth is like a razor blade.’”
Despite her abrasiveness and obnoxious behaviour, the reader will root for Carrie. It is impossible not to admire her drive and determination. Having been groomed almost from birth to be a tennis star, she sacrifices so much to achieve her goals. She is lonely but after a relationship ends badly, she decides, “Whatever soft parts of my heart I had tentatively exposed . . . it had been a mistake. I would never again be that type of fool.” Even her brutal honesty is refreshing. For instance, when a male player diminishes her tournament win because men play five sets whereas women play three, Carrie verbally attacks: “’if I played you two out of three or three out of five, I would drag you across the court and murder your -.’” And she must accept constant criticism from the media and the public who are quick to judge: “When I decided to play professional tennis, I apparently signed a contract to let people talk shit about me for the rest of my life.”
Sexism in sport is one of the issues examined. Carrie lacks charm so the media turns on her. She describes how sports commentators want her to behave: “It was okay to win as long as I acted surprised when I did and attributed it to luck. I should never let on how much I wanted to win or, worse, that I believed I deserved to win. And I should never, under any circumstances, admit that I did not believe all of my opponents were just as worthy as I was. . . . they wanted a woman whose eyes would tear up with gratitude, as if she owed them her victory as if she owed them everything she had.” Her self-assured attitude earns her nicknames like The Battle Axe and worse, whereas male players who show confidence are lauded; even her father is nicknamed The Jaguar. As a woman tennis player, she is expected to be beautiful and graceful as well as competent. Another female player comments “’because you like to hit a ball around a court . . . it’s okay for people to call you ‘the Beast’ just because you’re strong? And they can comment on your clothes and hair?’” I loved Carrie’s reference to living “in a world where exceptional women have to sit around waiting for mediocre men.”
During her comeback, Carrie is very much on a journey of self-discovery. It is obvious that her childhood experiences and her upbringing, coached by her single father, have shaped her personality. She has focused on her career and, she agrees when a coach says, “’being the very best is antithetical to being happy.’” She is so pre-occupied with winning that she ceases to enjoy playing and loses the joy of success: “When did winning become something I needed in order to survive? Something I did not enjoy having, so much as panic without?" When she announces her comeback, Carrie’s agent questions whether it is honour or ego that is driving her. Bowe Huntley, a player who becomes increasingly important in her life, tells Carrie, “’you came back to win, not to play.’” Her father and others try to show her that greatness can be measured in many different ways, that achievements are ephemeral, and that it is possible to “’[feel] secure, even knowing you are not the best.’” Carrie struggles throughout with making peace with her limitations, with accepting that she can be, as Bowe describes her, perfect despite her imperfections. She also struggles with making room in her life for others and opening herself to love and happiness.
Initially I was concerned that the focus on tennis and my lack of knowledge of the sport would impede my enjoyment, but that proved not to be the case. All that the reader needs to know is clearly summarized near the beginning. The games are described in such a way that I became fully invested in the outcome. Will Carrie be able to defeat her younger, faster opponents? The suspense had me turning pages quickly.
What did bother me is the Spanish dialogue. Carrie and her father often speak in Spanish and there is not always a clear indication of what they’re saying. I was able to decipher some of their conversations but found myself frustrated when I couldn’t.
Despite my initial misgivings, I found this book an entertaining, even compelling, read. The ending, though very satisfying, had me wishing for more.
Note: I received a digital galley from the publisher via NetGalley so the quotations in my review may not be exactly as they will appear in the final copy.
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